An Ode to PMS

You really have a chip on your shoulder

spreading irritability around the world

Why do you have to put a dampener on things

for every single girl?

We were minding our own business

happy with our lives

and then you waltz in with your dark grey cloud

and our partners are hiding the knives

Hey PMS take a chill pill will ya?

I've got heaps of stuff on my list

if you don't stop interfering with my mind about now

you are really gonna make me pissed

oh hang on , I see, that is just what you want

I'd be playing right into your hands

Well PMS I am not going to stoop to your level

because I have happy plans

Don't try and make me feel fat, ugly and tired

cos I won't let you convince me of that

go hound some other girl whose down on her luck

and make her whinge that she is fat

You have an attitude problem PMS

have you ever considered taking up meditation?

I wish you'd get some OMMMMS into your life

cos I have had it with your cranky infatuation.